Family is forever.

I was lucky to be born into my family. 

My mom has been nothing but supportive and encouraging my entire life.  She never let me settle for anything less than my full potential, pushing me to more than I knew I was capable of. She has loved me unconditionally from the day I was born. 

My sister is my best friend. We communicate without language.  Always have. There is nothing that I could tell her that would change what she thinks of me. There’s a freedom in that that you don’t realize until you experience. 

I know that not everyone is so lucky. 

I also know that I am lucky to have a group of people outside of my blood family that are my own - a handful of people that I rock with through thick and thin, whose backs I have to the end of days, who remind me of who I am when I’ve forgotten. 

Family. 

Blood and more than blood. 

I know that not everyone is so lucky. 

Family is why I’m in Nigeria this summer. 

Ola is why I’m in Nigeria. 

I met Ola last June and within a month he was in my family.  It took a few weeks for the legal paperwork to be official, but he had my heart from the beginning. 

Ola grew up in Nigeria, though you would never know that he wasn’t a native New Yorker, besides the fact that he has a gentleness about him that most New Yorkers lose by the age of three. 

When I was considering where to go this summer I really only considered one option. I wanted to meet the blood family of the young man that stole my heart and the hearts of my own blood family. 

I had to come here. I had to see where he grew up. I had to meet his mother, his grandmother. 

I had to meet my family on the other side of the world. 

Though I had only ever seen her photo before, I knew her instantly when I saw her at the airport. It was 3 am and we were both exhausted, but the joy between us sustained us for hours. 

I did not meet a stranger that day, I met family that I had never known before. 

We talked for hours at the airport while we waited for our taxi.  She told me stories about the kind of kid that Ola was; kind, studious, and obedient.  The same as he is today. I showed her photos of us together at holidays and birthdays and celebrations. I showed her photos of moments where I was privileged enough to support him as I watched him shine.  

Family. 

I’ve stayed with so many different people in so many foreign lands. Everyone has been welcoming. Everyone has altered their daily lives in order to host me.  But, this is different. This was different from before I even got on a plane. 

This is family. 

Bilikis has not treated us as honored guests. She has loved us like we belong to one another - because, in fact, we do. 

It doesn’t matter how much I tell her that we are content, that we are satisfied, that we don’t need anything, she cannot stop taking care of us. 

Ironically, we just want to take care of her, of her son. 

You know, like families do. 

I have my niece by my side throughout this entire experience and I could not feel more grateful for the family that I was born into, that she was born into - and for the one that I have collected along the way. 

Family is forever.